• Mothers who feed their children inside the church. I know children are moody when they're hungry, but can't you feed them at home? Or bring something as simple as bread. At least bread doesn't have strong smell like fried rice and eggs.
• People who forget they parked at a place where other people can't get out unless they get out. And sometime after you got tired of waiting, came a running woman, panicky look, moved her car an inch, and then go back in because she's suppose to be in the committee or something, and you have to struggle hard moving your car backwards and forwards just to get out of the line.
• Old men with too tight pants. After a series of sitting, standing, kneeling, the pants might be stuck in between his ass. And being a self diagnosed obsessive compulsive, I can't pray while looking at something as distracting as that. Unless I straightened some things out. But I can't, right. Or I'd be sued for a sexual harassment complaint.
• Light weighted rocking chair. Okay, here goes the story. In most churches here, the place where you sit connects with a place where people behind you kneel. So if many people are kneeling at the same time and the chair is light weighted, this may come as the result:

• Impressive is when you enter a party and everybody notice and take turns to say hello-how-are-you. Trying too hard is when you take turns to say hello-how-are-you to everybody then start to pay special attention to people you think matter the most. Fuckin butt kissers annoy the hell out of me.
• Impressive is when you bought someone a present and they remember it even though the next year maybe you forgot their birthday. Trying too hard is when someone gives you a present and you give them something back like food or chocolate in return the very next day.
• Impressive is when you offered a drink to guests and after a sip they seriously compliment you, you say thank you. Trying too hard is when the guests compliment, you share the recipe and offer to make them nice roast beef with mashed potatoes for dinner.
• Impressive is when you wear long-sleeves when it's cold and guys still turn their heads. Trying too hard is when you insist on wearing halter neck on cold windy and rainy days just for the sake of popping half your boobs out.
• Impressive is when you buy fake Gucci wallet and people won't notice. Trying too hard is when you empty your piggy-bank to buy real mink and people pretend to touch your arm while saying hello because they're trying to prove otherwise.
• Impressive is when you call someone and they call you right back after they know. Trying too hard is when you call them over and over and over and over and over and over..and yet they're never there.
• Impressive is when people refuse to let you be the one behind the camera when it's picture time. Trying too hard is running from the toilet with half your skirt still up because you don't want to miss it.
• Impressive is when you ask people for a favor, they happily accept because they like you and not because they feel they have to. Trying too hard is offering to help without being asked.
• Impressive is when your car is messy and people who complains ended cleaning it automatically while saying how unorganized you are. Trying too hard to impress is when you clean your, otherwise messy, car before you pick someone (haha I actually write this point just for the sake of saying I'm impressive)
• Impressive is when you're quiet during the whole meeting and your boss still notices your attendance. Trying too hard is cutting people in the middle of their talks, and arguing your way through friends that now consider you as a threat just so you look smart and capable.
• Impressive is when people don't know you are really the brain behind a great project and yet they still admit you're a great person. Trying too hard is when other people succeeded, you tell everyone you know them and act like they're your best friends (like, in a conversation, you'll hear: Oh yeah, I know her well, she's great. She's a friend of a friend of a relative of my boyfriend's third cousin).
• Impressive is when you help people sincerely. Trying too hard is when you make deals to help other people when you know you're not capable of helping and end up asking other people to help you.

..yeah and my world is currently full with the second one..la la la let's just sing: Damien Rice - Cannonball

• The original ones cost about 180.000 Rupiahs or like US$18. Cheap? You'd think. Here, that equals to:

• Sugar cubes: It's easier to just put it inside your mouth and drink the tea rather than wait for it to solve and have half a cup of unsweetened tea and half a cup of too-sweetened tea.

• Chocolate covered coffee beans: never, and I mean never, and trust me when I say never, eat those beans if you already can't sleep before midnight and are addicted to coffee. You'll end up watching TV at 4.30 AM with a dysfunctional brain and fully functional eyes.  

• Cinnamon sticks: Better than powder cause they don't make your sneezes taste like apple pie. Plus, they have multiple functions to stir as well as to add flavor.

• Oreos: Not good for a date. Unless you're dating your best friend. The options are either you end up being told by your date that is trying hard not to laugh that you have bits of Oreos stuck in your teeth, or you end up smiling weirdly trying to cover your teeth and thinking, oh God what if my teeth are black.

• Kim chi + cola: I don't know how they do it, but the combination makes me feel like there's a group of ants biting my tongue.

• Birthday cakes: I never have the guts to eat those. If it's a child's birthday party, there must be some part in your plate that got too many frostings and taste pure marzipan and no cake. Or there must be some part for you that got melted candles all over, which you eat because you think it's marzipan but turns out it's not. Either way you lose. If it's grown up's birthday party, it's either fine to eat or it's even worse. It's fine when they order plain tiramisu with writings on top. Worst come to worse is you eat a cake with 'ha – irth' or 'pp – thda' on it. Cake that makes me chickened out is the ones that have my friend's face on it, technologically speaking I don't know how the bakery does it but it's like printed pictures, and you'll have to choose paper plates with slices of your friend's left eye, right ear, middle teeth with half lips, nostrils, and people think this face-cake is such a brilliant idea?

• Cheese sausages: Don't trust the instructions when they said these yummy sausages can be fried. After a few minutes the cheese started to burst out and it's sausages and cheese strings all over. Not that they taste bad.

Listening to: Death Cab For Cutie - I Will Follow You Into The Dark

love of mine someday you will die but I'll be close behind, I'll follow you into the dark, no blinding light or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight waiting for the hint of a spark

• If you got married before I do, then I have two options only, which is to come and literally die to see you starting a new life that does not involve me at all selfish as I am as many times I claimed I don't love you and I made sure they're true, or to stay home and hear about it after a few weeks from friends which would make me feel left out because I'm not there and wondering how beautiful your wife is on your wedding day. Either way, I lose my back up plan. Which is to get married if we both still haven't found the right one by the time we're 30. Which is not important at all cause either way I lose you. Which made me realize that you're not a back up plan at all cause I'm not suppose to miss a back up this much.. I guess I should just add this to my previous post. Time for a Plan B then.

Listening to: Ron Sexsmith - Gold In Them Hills

but if we only open our eyes we'd see the blessings in disguise, that all the rain clouds are fountains though our troubles seem like mountains, there's gold in them hills, so don't lose heart, give the day a chance to start

• When couples break up, they always said their spouse changed. Well, I know not a thing about this handsome stranger. So that reason of breaking up is not gonna bother me at all.

• PDKT's a stupid thing that only teenagers do. It's a phase where you're suppose to get to know the person you're going to ask out for a date and be girlfriends or boyfriends after. Hello? Being in a relationship IS the pre-marriage step to get to know each other. So what's this, a pre-pre-marriage get together? I'd say just go for it. Life's that short.

• Getting married to someone you don't know at all is plain romantic. And getting to know that person is quite a challenge you have to face everyday. It'd make married life less boring, instead of a steady long term relationship where you get to predict each movement he's gonna make and know better which side he's gonna be sleeping tonight (which, in a fight, is considered the table side, which means the floor, or the lamp side, which means the sofa).

• You have all your life to discover what's his positive and negative points, his everyday's rhythm, does he talks while he sleeps, which razor you should secretly use to shave your legs without him knowing, what's his favorite food, what would he do in a fight, what's his favorite position, what kind of crappy music is he listening to on a Sunday morning, and by the time you finish discovering and started to get sick of it all, it's just time to go die and you'd be appointed to held seminars up there cause you're both the only old married couple died of a heart attack and broken hips because of the back-flip position he insisted trying.

• Eloping is a low budget-easy to do-none hard feelings taken-no free food for family you don't really know-no free flow for friends you don't really care.

• I heard you get a stack of chips for every time you get married in Vegas.

• Disneyland's my daydream-honeymoon favorite place. And it's not that far from Vegas isn't it, considering I live in a faraway continent.

• You get to choose what you're gonna wear when saying I do. No heavy make-up and high heels when you're suppose to be standing all night hand-shaking one by one each guest that came and has the courtesy of saying congratulations first before they hit the food-stalls. Once I even consider, if I really have to be on stage all night, I'd wear a rrreaallly big ball-gown like Cinderella, and underneath I'd hide a bar stool so people won't know that I'm actually sitting while I look standing.

• I had a dream a few years back about me walking down the aisle to a Learn to Fly performed live by Foo Fighters. I may have the chance to realize it. Well, with the CD at least.

• If showing hands are restricted and they should be covered at all times, a hint of fingernails must be damn hot then. At bars guys would yell 'take off your gloves baby woohoo' and annually beaches would held Wet Gloves Contests. 

• For guys:

  • Too out there combined with tight shirt is plain Will (or Grace?)

  • Hair above the nipples with beer belly and it's Bert from Sesame Street (guess which part is the nose).

  • Too pink and it's Babe on the run.

• For girls:

  • Too out there combined with tiny tank tops and guys think you're horny (when it's only hot weather, really).

  • Too out there but tried to cover it with bra with no stuffing, cause your breast alone is enough stuffing for a cup, and girls will gossip behind your back saying you don't know how to pick the proper size (it's true, I went to an all-girls high school and I did gossip a little).

  • Too out there and didn't try to cover it and suddenly you're a bitch with no girlfriends (with additional gawking boyfriends of those jealous girlfriends).

• For moms:

  • Too out there and your neighbors would think you don't care about how you look and that's why someday your husband will definitely cheat on you.

  • Too in and your baby won't suck it (baby as in 'oh so cute, look at those little fingers', not as in 'oh yeah that's it, look at those not so little fingers').